Notes From the Booby Hatch

I began my proper Gelato education many years ago in Vancouver, at a spot known to a few locals. Tucked in beside a railway siding in what can kindly be called an "emerging area" La Casa Gelato is an Alladin's Cave of gelato. They advertise 218 flavours at any given time, but have over 500 under their belt. Special flavours are brought out seasonally. Around St Patrick's Day, you'll find Guinness gelato. Catering to the large Asian community, you will find flavours like Purple Yam, Lychee, Garlic and Ginger, Akbar Mashti and dozens of others. Since they encourage you to taste many samples, a visit to LCG is a fun trip - when it's not totally packed!

  

If LCG gave me a Bachelor's degree with honours, Italy was a Master's course in gelato snarffling. The quality and the range of flavours were magnificent.

All this to say that I fancy myself as somewhat informed in matters gelatan. So imagine my surprise this weekend to find that there was breaking international news on the subject of ice cream! From Covent Garden, London - a fun hangout - comes news of ice cream made from breast milk. HUMAN breast milk.

Truly. Flavoured with vanilla and lemon zest, this confection is served in a martini glass for £14 per scoop and is called Baby GaGa. While sole source at present (thank you, Victoria Hiley) another dozen or so women are thinking of becoming suppliers. Until then, the demand is exceeding the supply.

I have to admit, I'm not impressed by the name. Can't they do better than Baby GaGa? Whose boob idea was that? If they were looking to make a statement, wouldn't their first flavour be Melon? (No, YOU grow up!!!)

Ben and Jerry's apparently turned down a similar opportunity when suggested by PETA a few years back. Pity. 

What flavours will be churned out when there is a big enough herd? 

Nipple Ripple?

I've Got a Lovely Pair (of) Coconut?

Rack 'O Rolo?

Pointer Sisters Sorbet?

Knocker Nut Fudge?

My Eyes Are Up Here Heavenly Hash?

Hazelnut Headlights?

Toffee Nut Twins?

Lame, I agree. My vote would have to go to Dulce La Leche League.

I have a feeling, based on a long-ago marketing course and some personal knowledge of the current market, that the most popular flavour, regardless of content, would simply be called Boobs. 

I must say, I am a little alarmed by the possibility they could broaden their base to include Banana Splits. You would definitely have to get a room.